I woke to the news that the fantastically wonderful Robin Williams has died. Suspected suicide. I was incredibly shocked, saddened, and started to cry. This was in the midst of me trying to leave the house for my (currently) only paid regular job of one morning a week, leaving my daughter (Pea) and eldest son (Boi) with KP who is 21 months, juggling writing a note for my mum who was on her way with my dad who is overhauling Peas bedroom. And waiting for a furniture delivery from IKEA.
I felt so sad, as though I'd lost a friend. We have so many happy family memories around films, one of the strongest being Mrs Doubtfire. We all loved it, loving the craziness and wacky humour. I will never forget Boi wandering into Jon when he was very small, saying 'Dad' 'Pe-pe-pe-pe-pe-pe-Piss off Dad! We (Diva, my eldest daughter, 6 years older than Boi, and Pea, 2.5 years older than him) burst out into hysterical laughter as Jon was not impressed and Boi had no idea what he'd said! Happy times! Once I'd left Jon, five years ago, it held very different connections for Boi, who was seven at the time. He couldn't watch it for a while because it made him sad, because the family has split up in the film, and now we had too.
I am literally exploring my feelings and asking why? As I'm writing this post. For me, Robin Williams passing is much more than a well loved, treasured actor leaving us.
I hate the thought of anyone feeling so alone, so low, so down that they make the choice to end their life. Life, however hard, is precious. Our animal, gut, survival instinct is to live. So how must someone feel to override that, and end theirs.
Oh god, Adele's Someone Like You is now playing - I'd better go before I have a meltdown in the middle of McDonald's. (Sneaking a quick Cappuccino before work). Oh no, and I'm going to be late. I just had to write this.
Goodbye Robin, you truly feel like an old friend, someone who I didn't see often, but was there. Someone to call on if we needed cheering up. May you find peace, and happiness where you are x x
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